Unknown Date (Laura to Frank)

To: Mr. Frank Thomas
Room 816
The Wistoria
New York, NY

From: LD
Havana, Cuba


Frank Darling,

Of course I will help you bring down that anchovie-loving bitch. Her real name is Francine Stewart. She was raised amongst Catholics in Bath. Insanity runs in her family - so don't be shocked by her behavior darling. But the kicker is this: she has an unfortunate sister that no one knows about - especially not Mr. Five! And who do you think that sister married? One Mr. Benjamen Wells - Dead!

But never mind all that Frank dearest darling - but you must hate me for I'm such a sap! Who would have thought me fo all people would leave this game a victim like any of those other idiots - and a victim of the biggest idiot of them all - I'm in Love with Conrad Wilkinson, frankie, and I can't keep this out of my head - you'll help me won't you, frank dear - with your brandy and shoulder and wonderful hand on the small of my back! for I must see him again or I will run mad, just like that whore Ann Marie Wells -

Love you always, my pillar of strength,
Laura

October 26, 1911 (Marjorie to Paris Ned)

Marjorie Wells
Wilkshire-on-the-Bog
Shropshire
England

Edward Wells
aka Ned Devine
Paris
France

Dear Edward,

I know you are not partial to that name anymore, but really your preferences chance so capriciously it is difficult to keep pace. I hope you will forgive your sister for addressing herself to the boy she once knew in case you are thereby moved to recall what remains of that boy's tendernes and filial sentiment.

Indeed, I must hope this letter reaches you at all, given that I hear rumors of your presence from all corners of the globe. Truly, Edward, I begin to believe there is a slow magnetism drawing all delight from poor Wilkshire-on-the-Bog and a good number of the young men as well. Don't you dare make one of your wicked puns- though truly I am in such straits that I could almost miss your horrid witticisms- at least they come from a mind sane and collected enough to comprehend a joke.

Oh, Edward, Mother is bad. Not even Conrad knows. Though I fear that what he does know is enough. Why should he want a country cousin with increasingly threadbare clothing and an increasingly mad mother? You musn't think that's a complaint about the money you send. It isn't money that I need from you.

Heavenly powers, Edward. I begin to think all men are cowards, always floating away from the mess. Father and you and my beloved Conrad and even poor old Tom.

But what a mad thing to say. Forgive me, Edward, disprove my exhausted fears and come. There are bonds stronger than love.

Your hapless sister,
Marjorie

unknown date (Alice Mae to Paris Ned)

Dear Cousin Ned,

Gosh! It was so frightfully grand to hear from you! I am so delighted to hear of all your fine adventures. They are finer even than Conrad's, and he has some really bully- I mean some really fine times.

Mother says bully is an extremely vulgar word, and that young ladies should express themselves more decorously. Now, I think bully and decorous are both really terrific words, and I don't know why one should be so polite and the other so vulgar. Maybe you understand this, since you are a man of letters and as Father puts it, "of some importance in the newspaper." He sounds very proud of you when he says it. You can tell by how deep his voice gets. It's only been so deep for me when I caught the whooping cough so severely last winter and Doctor Robinson said I was out of the woods. Of course, I hadn't been in the woods at all since I got sick. I hadn't even been out of doors. But I hope some day I get Father's deep voice for something more exotic that to recover from the whooping cough, which after all people do every day, Anyway, I guess I should wrap up because it is time to go to school. Do write again soon of all your fine times.

Yours with all due respect (isn't that a lovely phrase?),

Alice Mae Wilkinson

November 9, 1911 (Mr. Five to Frank)

From the Desk of Mr. Five

To: The Gentleman of Room 816
The Wistoria
New York, NY

Dear Frank,

I was very pleased to hear the report of your outing with the Target. It sounds as though everything went off without a hitch. Please don't concern yourself about my agitation - I assure you ti will not get the best of me. (Indeed, it will not get any more of me than it has already, if I judge myself rightly.) As to what you can do . . . more of the same, for now. Keep your eyes open and play your cards close to the belt.

With regard to Mme 4, tread carefully there as well. There is a great deal to that story that you do not know, and you must be sure to take no drastic action at this time. I cannot say much more through this particular medium, but please remember that though I am a shadow beside you both, there are other shadows too.

Speaking of, and to tie our topics of conversation together, I would like to emphasize that there are various matters that we must keep in confidence between ourselves - for example, any personal revenge I may have an interest in at some future time, and also the source of a certain lady's current fetching suntan. I know you are the sort of man who guards his secrets well. That is why I asked for you. We must have confidence in each other, Frank.

I look forward to brunch.

Mr. Five

November 8, 1911 (Mme. 4 to Frank)

To: The Gentleman of Room 816
The Wistoria
New York, NY

Frank,

Charmed.

Mme. 4

November 8, 1911 (Frank to Mme. 4)

To: Mme 4
To be delivered by hand

From: The Gentleman of Room 816
The Wistoria
New York, NY

Madame,

Dinner would by my pleasure. In fact, my treat. I know a lovely little place where we won't be disturbed.

Don't worry- I'll make sure there is no fish on the menu.

I'll pick you up Tuesday at 8. Save your appetite.

Frank

November 8, 1911 (Frank to Mr. Five)

To: Mr. Five
An undisclosed location
To be delivered by hand

From: The Gentleman of Room 816
The Wistoria
New York, NY

Sir,

I must admit your last letter alarmed me not a little. I hope it was written in a moment of frustration and that you have since calmed down and reasoned with yourself. It is always best not to engage one's emotions in such a business. But of course you know that. I don't mean to preach, sir, but I am a bit concerned. Let me know if there's anything I can do. I'm happy to oblige.

I was so glad to hear your little piece of intelligence about Mme. Four. I had heard no reports of how it went over. The truth is that she has been hounding me lately, pressing me for information about you. But I am dealing with the situation.

But now on to my main piece of news. I finally renewed my acquaintance yesterday with the target. I showed him around Wall Street. He was very impressed by the Stock Exchange and covered his ears when we first went in due to all the shouting. Of course he wanted to buy some stocks in some sort of touristic curiosity, and he spent three dollars on ten shares of some new company called AT&T. I took him out to lunch and we played bridge in the afternoon.

He has a new love interest, about whom I discretely tried to find out as much as I could. This was not difficult as the target is prone to bragging. I don't think she will be a problem. She might even help things along; she's Polish. Her parents are, of course, quite wealthy Poles, but I've observed the police in this country don't seem to make that kind of distinction. I believe her name is Annya.

Oh yes- and everything is properly planted. I made up some story about an old flame and a box of letters she shouldn't see. We're perfectly safe- no gentleman reads another chap's old love letters.

You can begin taking the next steps as soon as you like.

Do let me know if there's anything else I can do for you. Let me treat you to brunch on Wednesday. I'd like to discuss that little favor I mentioned before.

Your servant, etc.

Frank